If I aint got nothin' to lose.

Mood: Irritated
Music: Andrew W.K.-She is beautiful

Oh my god, if it's one thing to have a friend who likes you to the point where you try really really hard to say; "I don't really like you"
Turns around and says "I want a relationship with you" It is super annoying!
No offense, the kid is super fun, cause we hung out today and had some super duper laughs. But I could tell he wanted me to say I liked him back.
I don't know what to do..
I just want to slam my head down on this desk over and over again!
What the hell do I do? I am not going to stop talking to him, that's super mean and plus Matt hasn't asked that of me yet...
Hmm..all I can do is just talk about Matt and make him think I'm not interested?
I didn't think this was going to come back to me..
But it makes me wonder;
Am I seeing this from someone else's perspective from when I went through this?
How ironic..

Yet he is moving back to New York and going back to Cornell University.
This kid is super smart, I have no idea why he even finds me the least bit attractive, I'm trying really hard to just make him dislike me but not in that kind of way.
Leaning on the friendship side.


Ugh!



In other life-news...
Matt came home today and oh god, he's hot! lol, I never realized it before but when I was walking the dog outside at Matt's house he pulled up music blasting and I looked at him and said; "Hey sexy! Whatchu doin around here?!"
He laughed but after he parked his car he hugged me so tightly that I felt like I was in the most perfect place.
There is no where I'd rather be than in Matt's arms, I feel perfect and it's a comfy match.
I love my Pumpkin head.

I bought him this Punisher comic book styled huge poster and it was the cutest thing to see his face light up [and his dad's..] they were both so ecstatic about it that I felt like I made the right choice in gift for him.
I love my boyfriend :]
And tomorrow after work around 7:30 is Domi-Day/Night
:D
Super stoked :D

<3



I'm pretty much floating around cloud 9 right now..

Hah :]