The littlest things...

I feel like I am not myself most days. These days I am always complaining about being irritated and about school not going my way as well as other upsetting things. And that just isn't me. I needed to realize that I very much am a big downer at the moment.
But I wanted to share a story that made me feel like I should really take in the simplest things in life.


Yesterday, at work a little girl at the simple age of three was clinging to her Mommy during one of the laser tag missions I was marshaling. She wasn't wearing a pack, just clinging to the side waist clip staring at everything around her wide-eyed. I walked by and looked at her and smiled. I made a comment to her Mom saying how adorable she looked just holding onto her. Then suddenly, this little three year old stared at me for a moment that seemed like forever. She let go of her mother and clearly stated to me that she was staying with me. At that moment I found her hand clinging onto mine, squeezing it ever so tightly as if she were afraid I'd disappear. I smiled to myself but felt quite uneasy at the moment since we are not allowed to touch children. But I realized that she was the one who took my hand in hers and she was insistent on us staying together. And together we stayed for fifteen minutes. She was so cute that we ended up having a conversation about her cute Tinkerbell jacket she was wearing that lit up to motion. But soon the game was almost over and I had to leave. Still following her mom and brother, I got down to her level, her hand still holding mine and I said to her "Sweetheart why don't you just stay with your Mommy now? I have to go and get ready for the game to be over." She shook her head no but her Mom told her that I had to get back to work. Reluctantly she let go of my hand, looking like she was about to cry, I leaned over and said to her "Don't worry, I'll be outside waiting when you get out." And with the biggest smile on her face she said so loudly and ever so clearly, "Okay!"
That made me feel so special in so many ways I don't think anyone can ever understand how that touched my heart.
Little kids are so cute and to see the smile on their faces is another one of life's simple ways of saying, 'I care...'

xoxo,

domi

Round 2.

Believe it or not, but it's true. I have decided to go for the Disney College Program once again! I believe that because of the events that followed after my Disney Audition last year, it was reasonable that I did not make it to the program. But this time around I am hoping to be at the "Happiest Place on Earth".
I am hoping for Attractions, but if not I'll settle for Merchandise, Photopass Photographer, Recreation and I am sure I chose something else but I can't remember at the moment. But I am not going to get super excited about it as much as I want to because it was such a disappointment last year. I am excited internally.
So if I get in I will be there for the Fall season, and when I come back I will then go to the college that I got accepted in.

In other news, this week has seemed to be really sh*tty for me and I am hoping that my attitude turns around sometime today before tomorrow when I have my interview (For Disney)! Next to that I am getting sick and tired of some people around here. Their sarcasm and smart ass remarks are really making me reconsider their friendship. I was always good at knowing who hates me or dislike me for any reason.
So if you find yourself removed from my friend's list on Facebook, don't take it personally. I already knew you disliked me but for some reason you didn't want to remove me from your friend's list, so I did it for you :)
Anyway, I am off to class now!
I will try to update as often as I can!

-domi

One Giant post of Stress.

I am completely and utterly paranoid; it’s as if I think the entire world is against me. And it quite possibly could be. I can’t go on each day without feeling depressed or any other possible worse feeling ever. I feel like I screwed myself up with lowering my GPA all thanks to Statistics. I blame myself for never applying myself and now I have a fear I won’t end up either at UF or UCF. I feel like a senior all over again and I hate it. If I want to talk about how I feel I can’t because again I feel like no one would care to listen or even want to know how I’m feeling. I’ve never felt like this before and it’s driving me insane. Sometimes I think I need a therapist because I can’t get a grip on feeling comfortable with myself and all I want to do is cry because everyone else is abandoning me.
If anyone can give me a good therapist I am going to need it and I hope they are free. I don’t have the money to be spending on talking about my problems when I think all I need is someone to talk to me and listen to me.
Even writing this blog I feel guilty for the way I feel, the way I complain and I know I shouldn’t.
I even experienced my first panic attack this past Sunday. I swore I was dying but I was fighting myself to not faint and at which one point I just did on my bed and had to calm myself down by sleeping it off. I swear I am going through my midlife crisis already and I haven’t even turned 21 yet! I need to stop worrying what to do and how I am going to get through life because I just need to go with the flow with the decisions I make and that’s that.
I just wish that things were a bit easier…
I know I can make it easier for myself, I just need to learn how to sort out my life.

A Great Welcome Back!

My creativity has seemed to have slipped from me with all of these frustrations in my life at the moment called, College.
Before the ranting, I must say I have amazing friends and it is the start of Winter Break. Bring it. No more frustrations, I'll deal with it January 6, 2010!
Some Photos for your entertainment;



Working on my Final Project.



Finished Product.



So this past Thursday I hung out with some old friends and had a lovely time over some yummy Chipotle Burritos..



Noelle & I at Steak N' Shake



Christian :)

*People who we hung out with that I did not put up their photos are: Matt Kaplan, Matt Keller & DJ, hah!

Well this is all that I have for now!
Keep on returning for now more recent updates!

xoxo,

domi

For Ava.

For Sheye;



Happy Birthday Ava.


You are beauty full inside and out and I'm thinking of you everyday.


Love,

Dominique

Looking Out.

If anyone didn't already know this past weekend was rough, getting surgery & stitches is not good for a girl like me. But I was drugged up and numb so it was all good at the same time, lol
With the weekend behind me as a faint memory I am taking on each day as it comes.
Classes are almost over and that is something to really look forward to! Although class start again on the 24th, I am trying to get some time in with all my friends before I try to kill myself during Fall semester. I will miss the ones that are leaving and try my best to keep the connection with the ones who are still here.
I am going to apply to UCF and UF at the end of this month because like they say, the earlier the better! Depending on who accepts me I will go there.
I know I said in a previous post that I wanted to be a Psychologist and get my PhD, but is that what I really really want? I have no clue. At this point I feel like I am floating on water and just going with the motions. I seriously need to get back on track and focus on what I want.
A Psychologist, a Preschool teacher, a Photographer (that is what I WILL be).
Meh, if I stick to what I already planned then life will be much easier.

Anyway, I know it's quite boring whenever I write things that may seem uninteresting to others I will stop here and continue on with another blog post, sometime hopefully very soon!



My Brother & I 10 hours after surgery, lol



Trevor, lol I love his shirt!



Me at Borders with Trevor



That mini photo-shoot I did today, one of the photos I took. My cousins say I look like my Mom or Aunt. lol



Me during a different photo-shoot. Musicophilia has got my brain wrapped up in Neurology.



Me & Patrick after the crew meeting



Katie wayteee & I



Trevor Beaw & I :]



Me & Nys, I was pretending to be as short as she is lol
I'm only 2 inches taller :P

*Please note that in above pictures with me in my work clothes my face was still swollen lol since this was Sunday morning.

xoxo,

domi

Best I ever had- Drake.

Maybe one day I'll be appreciated and told how I'm the best, the best he's ever had.
Hell, I'm the only girl he's ever been with, I still hope I'm the best he's ever had.


xoxo,

domi